The situation: The husband is awake, is up, has showered, shaved, and has made and eaten breakfast. The wife remains motionless under the covers, in bed.
The husband thinks to himself, "My poor darling must really need her sleep. I'll be real quiet so she can get all the rest she needs."
The wife thinks to herself, "That selfish shit is going to let me stay in bed forever. It's like he doesn't care that I'm around. I could be gone and he wouldn't know or care."
Scientists say we must doubt in cases where there is no evidence that a thing imagined actually exists, and therefore, there are no parallel universes.
I say, don't so quick to deny parallel universes, there, Sparky.
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A man is at home alone watching the football game when his wife gets home. She is looking especially nice, and there's a look about her that catches his eye. Besides: half-time had just started, so he muted the TV and gave her his full attention.
"Darling," she says, have you ever seen twenty dollars all crumpled up?"
Not sure if there's some sort of joke -- or maybe some seduction -- starting, the man plays along. "Well, no," he says.
She gives him a sexy seductive little smile, unbuttons the top 3 or 4 buttons of her blouse, and slowly reaches down into the cleavage created by a sexy, lacy, silky push-up bra, and pulls out a crumpled twenty dollar note.
He takes the crumpled bill and looks up to see what's next.
"Have you ever seen fifty dollars all crumpled up?" she asks.
"No, I can't say that I have," he replies, playing along and warming to this little game.
She gives him another sexy, secretive, knowing little smile, slowly pulls up her tight little skirt higher and higher, and seductively reaches into her tight, sheer panties, and pulls out a crumpled fifty dollar note.
He takes the crumpled bill and is really looking forward to the next step is this fun little game.
"Now darling," she says, "have you ever seen 50 thousand dollars all crumpled up?"
"I sure haven't!" he says, turning off the TV.
"Well," she says, "have a look in the garage...."
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